Faithful Wounds

If you have had a serious job interview in the last 30 years, you have likely been asked the dreaded question: “What is your greatest weakness?” It is the easiest question to botch.

To keep antsy seniors focused after spring break, I shifted our economics lessons to life skills—including finding jobs that pay a living wage rather than “McJobs.” Companies use standard questions to weed applicants out, so we practiced them.

I once asked a young man the “weakness” question. His answer was matter-of-fact: “I have a very violent temper.”

Nervous laughter rippled through the room—subdued only because, by his own admission, he really could be violent.

I told him flatly, “You can’t say that.”

He challenged me: “Well, shouldn’t they know the real me?”

I replied gently, “Son, for some of you, the real you is not very employable.”

That sounds harsh, but I’ve seen principals smile and nod while candidates disqualified themselves in the first 30 seconds. Someone needs to be honest. Over the years, when students told me, “You can’t talk to me like that,” I would ask, “Well, who can?” We all need someone to speak the unvarnished truth.

A true friend tells you what you don’t want to hear. The Bible says, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” (John 15:13).

We often assume this means taking a bullet, but that is unlikely. The Greek word for “life” (psychē) means more than physical existence. It means laying down your comfort to do whatever is needed to help someone.

Sometimes, “whatever is needed” means sharing a hard truth in Christian love. Consider the story of Nathan confronting David. David was the king of Israel with absolute power, yet he had committed adultery and murder to cover his tracks. He thought his secret was safe until his friend, the prophet Nathan, arrived.

Nathan knew the risk. You don’t accuse a king of murder unless you love him enough to save his soul, even if it costs your head. Nathan told David a story about a rich man stealing a poor man’s lamb. When David raged at the injustice, Nathan delivered the devastating truth: “You are the man!”

Nathan cared enough to risk his life for his friend’s restoration. That is the love the Bible calls us to demonstrate. Real Christian friendship is less about flattery and more about loving someone enough to risk their anger for their good.

Confronting someone is awkward and risks the relationship, but Nathan did what was needed. I have been on both sides of that encounter. Speaking that truth was often harder than hearing it about myself.

Ask God to show you both the Nathans you need to listen to and the friends who need your honest, humble courage. As Proverbs 27:6 says, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.”

We need friends like that to become the people God calls us to be.

. . . and that’s what I know today.